At church today, I was very convicted by the words “Let our passion bring You fame”…meaning whatever we are passionate about bring glory to God. And I started thinking about what this means…
Here is what God spoke to me… Words either give life or death. We often show our passion with our words. Lately, my words have been full of passion, but mostly of passionate anger. My words, born of anger, speak death. I am a professed Christian, and I speak death when I am angry.
That is not right. I am acting hypocritical when I profess and claim that I am a believer in Jesus, and then I outwardly show my anger bitterness, and hurt thru my words of death.
So, how do I address the anger that is born of so much suffering and hurt? A large part of my anger is at God for allowing my suffering. And yet, He never promised us a lack of suffering. Nor is my suffering any comparison to what Jesus suffered when He died on the cross for my sins. He did promise us that He will help us when the fires rage, and the waters drown, and the storms tremble…Isaiah 43:2.
So is my suffering worse than any others suffering? NO
Why, if the Lord promises to save me from my “…light and momentary troubles…” (Paul stated this about his own trials and tribulations), am I still so angry at Him? If the reverse were true, if God were angry at me, what would I do? I certainly would run away from Him, and wait for Him to forgive me. I would apologize for whatever I did that hurt Him, and wait for His forgiveness and reconciliation.
So if I am angry at God, then why would I expect Him to do anything different than I would do, or be willing to do? Is that fair, to expect Him to be better than I am willing to be? NO
I am, and have to be willing to forgive God for letting me suffer, and for these past 10 years of excruciating pain, because He would do, that and so much more, to show me His Love for me. He didn’t want me to suffer, but He allowed it. It was meant for my salvation, my edification, my learning in order to be a solider in His army while here on earth, the realm of satan. And in order for me to know that eternity is so much more than anything, any light and momentary pain I may suffer while here on earth.
J. E. Morse
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